Many parents disagree on how to properly discipline their children when they neglect chores and school work or talk back. These disagreements often become more pronounced after a divorce, especially when ex-spouses share in the decision-making responsibility. Very Well Family explains how divorced parents should approach common discipline issues to ensure their children are subject to consistent rules and expectations.
Communication is vital in any parenting relationship. That’s why you should convey messages directly to your ex instead of passing them along via your child. This is especially important when it comes to matters of discipline, which may be controversial subjects. Kids who feel put in the middle are less likely to feel safe and secure within a parenting relationship. In the same token, badmouthing the other parent’s rules is likely to incur similar feeling in your children.
Differences from house to house are common after parents get divorced. Provided your child is safe and his needs are being met, you’ll have to accept differences between your parenting styles. If decisions your ex is making, such as letting your child stay up late, are causing negative effects, be sure to outline these effects in a civil manner and find a reasonable solution. When you speak ill of the other parent, even when warranted, your child will take the words to heart.
Lastly, keep in mind that while divorce is emotionally stressful for kids, it doesn’t mean that you should cease discipline altogether. Consistency and rules are reassuring to youngsters, despite any protests you may hear when punishments are being meted out. When you fail to discipline a child’s for behavioral issues, these issues are bound to grow worse. It’s OK for your child to be sad or angry about the divorce, but these feelings shouldn’t be used as an excuse to act out.